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Relationship and Marriage counseling can help you discover how in harmony you are.

The two most crucial factors that decide how compatible you are as a couple are:

A similar degree of psychological health and maturity and a compatible ranking of Instinctual Variants.

What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the natural energies or drive that are essentially part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and is often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.

Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual variant are often with the essential existential needs as they translate into our modern society, for example, finance, food, housing, health, physical safety and comfort.
Being safe and physically comfortable are priorities, and they will often bring their supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable seating, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will like the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of pressing life necessities.
They are the most introverted of the types.

Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this type have a strong desire for severity of experience and intimacy. The honest riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a situation they automatically gravitate toward people they feel magnetized to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often ignoring pressing obligations or even basic hygiene if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a expansive exploratory approach to life, but can also generate a lack of focus on one’s own achievements.

Social Instinct.
People of this type are focused on their interactions with others and with the sense of value and esteem they receive from their involvement in collective activities. These include work, family, hobbies and clubs.
On entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the relationships and subtle politics between the different people and social circles. They are subconsciously attuned on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to interact with others to feel secure, alive and energised. They tend to love interacting with others, but they eschew intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.

Within a person, one of these Instincts will dominate. In fact these three instincts can be ordered like the layers of a cake, with the most predominant one at the top. The least powerful one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These instincts play a pivotal role in our relationships because personalities of the same variant tend to share values and to understand each other innately, and therefore feel very compatible.

In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.

For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.

For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.